day 1685 and the russian circus is running out of clowns, makeup, and fresh lies. moscow’s got protests, the regime’s got a “plan” that’s just running away in a new hat, xi’s playing 4d chess with putin, shiryayev’s lying like he gets paid by the syllable, and eight more pilots just clocked out for good. welcome to another episode of “how not to run a country,” starring terrified conscripts, angry pensioners, and z-bloggers with more cope than teeth.
moscow protests: fear, inertia, and vodka fires
moscow’s latest protests are not the “free iphone” kind, they’re the “we’re sick of this shit” kind. after another round of police crackdowns, the city’s mood is pure panic and paranoia. people are googling “how to emigrate with zero dollars” or whispering about coups, but mostly they’re just scared and tired.
the regime’s answer is always more riot cops, more arrests, and a fresh batch of tv talking heads calling everyone a foreign agent. it’s like watching a guy try to put out a grease fire with vodka, impressive in its stupidity. nobody actually believes in the system anymore, not even the ones paid to defend it. the only thing spreading faster than fear is the sense that the whole place is held together by inertia and the hope someone else blinks first.
even the babushkas are grumbling about food prices and grandkids either in a trench or in tbilisi. the kremlin pretends the protests are just a western tiktok challenge gone wrong. sure, and my grandma’s a nato general.
drapatogo’s “plan”: run, powerpoint, repeat
drapatogo is the new codeword for “run away fast and pretend it’s strategy.” the atlantic just dropped a piece about ex-defense minister fedorov wanting to paralyze moscow’s airports with ai drone swarms. sounds high-tech, but the only thing russia’s paralyzed lately is its own logistics. thirteen airports in the rostov zone shut down, flights grounded, and the only thing flying is the excuses.
the “mmdm” project was supposed to launch a thousand drones in one night. instead, it’s just another powerpoint fantasy. meanwhile, ukraine’s fpv drone game is on another level. they’re getting 90 new drones in a day, while russia’s still arguing about who stole the batteries. the only thing more advanced than ukrainian drones is russia’s ability to lose expensive hardware to guys with a laptop and a grudge.
every russian victory gets announced from a town 600 km from the town they actually lost. those maps are doing serious cardio.
air force: flying jobs program for undertakers
let’s pour one out for the eight russian pilots who just joined the “special operation” scoreboard. three planes and a helicopter down in one day, and that’s just what they admit. the official line is always “no losses,” but the graveyards are getting crowded and telegram channels are running out of euphemisms.
the russian air force is basically a flying jobs program for undertakers. they keep sending up old soviet junk, and ukraine keeps sending it back down in pieces. z-bloggers scream about “nato weapons,” but the real killer is russian incompetence. when your best pilots are dead, drunk, or in dubai, maybe rethink the “second army of the world” branding.
every time the regime says “we control the skies,” another pilot’s family gets a knock on the door and a medal that won’t pay the rent.
shiryayev and the propaganda olympics
enter shiryayev, the king of creative writing. his job is to explain why every defeat is a victory, every retreat is “tactical regrouping,” and every dead pilot is “resting.” his latest? claiming there’s no “kettle” near kupyansk, even as russian units run for their lives and leave behind more gear than a black friday sale.
the 20th army’s command keeps drawing red lines on the map, but the only thing they’re defending is their own careers. nobody gets punished, nobody takes responsibility, and the only thing that changes is the number of funerals. z-bloggers notice, but their solution is always “more mobilization, more repression, more lies.” it’s like fixing a leaky boat by drilling more holes.
the audience is getting restless, but the show must go on.
xi’s leash and the economic clown car
xi jinping is playing “what am i really thinking?” putin keeps flying to beijing, hat in hand, hoping for a bailout or at least a pat on the back. xi smiles, nods, and offers another “peace plan” that’s just a list of things china wants. the only thing more mysterious than xi’s real intentions is why anyone in moscow still thinks they’re the senior partner.
back home, the economy is pure comedy. gas prices are breaking records, the ruble’s doing its best meme coin impression, and “import substitution” means buying chinese knockoffs at triple the price. oligarchs are bailing, technocrats are updating their linkedin, and the only people still buying the official line are too broke to leave.
every week there’s a new “miracle weapon,” a new “breakthrough,” and a new reason why things will get better next month. spoiler: they won’t.
cannon fodder, protests, and the meat grinder
russian prisons are now a recruiting ground for cannon fodder, including women pulled from colonies to drag wounded men off the front. if you’re breathing and not already in a grave, congrats, you’re eligible for mobilization. the only thing more dangerous than being a russian soldier is being a russian with a conscience.
meanwhile, in ukraine, protests go on for the 26th day straight. the difference? nobody’s getting clubbed for holding a sign. people demand answers, the government listens, and the streets belong to citizens, not riot cops. it’s almost like democracy works better than dictatorship, but don’t tell the kremlin, they’re still allergic.
every time russia tries to flex, it pulls a muscle. the big “offensive” near orikhiv is just another meat grinder, with the “vostok” group trying to outflank ukrainian defenses and getting chewed up for their trouble. the goal is to create conditions for the “dnepr” group to advance, but the only thing advancing is the list of missing personnel.
the russian army’s main achievement this month is inventing new ways to lose ground and blame someone else.
the endless loop: deny, deflect, distract, repeat
the propaganda cycle is stuck on repeat:
- deny
- deflect
- distract
- declare victory
- repeat
the only thing more predictable than the lies is the failure. every time a z-blogger says “ukraine is finished,” the front line moves the wrong way. every time the regime says “the west is collapsing,” another russian oligarch buys a villa in spain. every time they say “we’re winning,” another batch of pilots doesn’t come home.
the regime’s got no plan except survive another week and hope the next crisis is someone else’s problem. the people are scared, the elites are bailing, and the only thing holding the country together is a mix of fear, apathy, and nostalgia for a past that never existed.
the real “mystery of xi” isn’t what china wants, it’s why anyone still thinks russia has leverage. the real “plan of drapatogo” isn’t some genius drone attack, it’s running away and calling it strategy. the real “truth of shiryayev” is that the only thing more fictional than his reports is the idea of russian victory. and the real “protests in moscow” aren’t about hope, they’re about desperation.
eight more pilots dead, a dozen more airports shut, another round of protests crushed, and the regime still pretending it’s all going according to plan. the only thing russia’s winning is the race to the bottom, and even that’s starting to look like a team sport. the circus rolls on, the clowns keep juggling, and the audience is getting tired of the same old tricks.
but hey, at least the washing machines are still safe. for now.
imagine being so free that the bravest thing you do all year is repost the state and pray nobody asks where your son went.